New Hampshire is the first state to crack down on what President Trump recently labeled the “biggest threat to our national security,”.

In the states most recent legislative session, both the House and the Senate almost universally agreed that jaywalking needs a greater legal penalty. Only one member of the State Congress, Martha Fuller Clark, voted against the bill, later releasing this statement:

“Honestly, jaywalking isn’t even a big deal. I voted against the bill as a statement. We need to focus our energy and abilities on problems that actually matter.

Senator Clark was found dead in her home in an apparent suicide. She apparently shot herself in the head with a military grade long-range rifle from approximately 1200 meters away. It is currently unknown if she chose to end her own life as a result of the vote.

Most Americans today will tell you that there is one major way that Donald Trump has managed to unite the masses. The president’s constant push for laws to make pedestrians safer has managed to avoid causing much partisan conflict. In a meeting with several New Hampshire Congresspersons, President Trump helped to draft the first felony jaywalking bill.

The law includes the following clarifications and punishments:

• Anyone who crosses a road at an undesignated time/area is guilty if jaywalking
• If it is your first offense, you will be served a sentence of a minimum $20,000 and/or 12 years in federal prison without parole
•  A second offense will get you at least two life sentences and state-enforced chemical castration
• If you have three or more counts of felony jaywalking, you will be publicly run over by a bus to serve as a reminder of the dangers of jaywalking

Contrary to popular belief, more pedestrian protection has been needed for a long time. 90% of fatal injuries in the US came from jaywalking last year. It is believed that this legislation will reduce all US deaths by around 70%.